Early October 2013

Finally, my (internet) Dream Girl.


(Excerpt from For the Birds Trapped in Airports)


My dear beautiful dream girl,

I want to warn you. When you spend as much time alone as I have lately, romantic thoughts can get out of hand a little bit. With deserved recognition for our generation's social focus, I owe a lot of thanks to the internet for the extent of my fantasies about you. You see, this loneliness creates elaborate exaggerations of what "could happen" with us. The fragments of your life that your sites display, the subtle/not-subtle gestures of your "likes" and hashtags; I fall into the gaps between these pieces and fill them with our prospective memories-to-be. In my head, we could be on our next vacation together, I'll introduce you to Mom and Dad (oh man, they're going to love you). 

I'm ready, dream girl. I'm ready for your next post that calls me out with a sweetly bold @. "Let's just date already," you type to me. I'm ready for it. I bet you are too. I bet you are the best kisser, but hey - I'm not just in it for that - what am I saying?! You know that already, you get me. You get me like no one else does. We're best friends! Yeah, we're one of those kinds of couples. Wow. You just look so beautiful today! I'd tell you that, but my friends say I shouldn't - that it's weird to say that to you. Can you believe it? Everything's going to change so soon! Here we are, an hour away from meeting - I finally got the gusto to ask you to meet up, despite our weird circumstances of e-familiarity. One hour! It's all we have left, and then everything will change. Everything will be different. Don't get me wrong, things won't be bad or anything. I mean, really, I think you'll be as perfect as I've daydreamed you would be. But now I'll know your eye color, and you'll know mine. Our tattoos will come into focus and you'll have a sound to you - a voice different than the one I've imagined. Things will be clear, not completely, but uniquely, to us. You'll have certain mannerisms and a schedule, an age, and we'll probably share friends because Chicago is generous like that. If I like you, I'm probably going to try to hide things from you - cover up certain ways about myself with a disguise that I think you'll like better. Hey though, if you like me - don't do that. Okay? Just be yourself. You be you, and I'll be me, okay? It's been really special knowing you like this - I can't wait to see what's next for us. 

Okay, okay. I'm on my way.